Surrender!

I have found my place of Zen. I have officially let go.

You get a pass on your actions and attitude when you're pregnant with twins. And while it is completely understandable that I've been bitchy and pissy and acting like a child in the throes of a tantrum, it's not acceptable and I know I need to pull myself together. So my husband took a day off work and I spent that time finishing my nesting and taking care of myself and getting as much sleep as possible. And I feel better.

It's time for me to let go. Of my expectations. Of my desires. Of my selfishness. I turn this all over to The One who's really in control. I told my babies how I would like them to be born and that I trust their knowledge of things I cannot know. They will be born the way they need to be born and we'll all be OK in the end.

My house is clean. My carpet has been scrubbed and is white again. My garage is devoid of junk. My housekeeper washed my house from top to bottom. My husband stocked the pantry and chopped veggies and precooked pounds and pounds of chicken. This afternoon we're going to finish getting the laundry washed and dried and put away and the kids are working on organizing and cleaning their rooms.

My world is in order, my mind is clear, and I am ready to give birth to twins--however that happens. I think we're going to see them some time next week.