18 weeks from me

Hard to believe I am 18 weeks into this pregnancy already. It really does seem like just a few days ago that I found egg white the day after getting busy with Dave.

I've turned a corner mentally this past week. I've gone to feeling movement daily and I really am beginning to connect with this little person inside me. It could even be said that I am moving towards excited and happily anticipating. I'm still very nervous about how I'm going to pull off that first few months when I don't have the support here that I had in Wichita. I am making some really wonderful friends in Dallas, but the annoying part about big city living is that everyone lives some distance away. It's not like in a small town where the furthest friend is Kathryn and it took her 20 minutes to get to my house! I had so many visitors those first few weeks who walked the floor with Ella and gave me a break from the screaming and insanity! I suppose it will work out. God wouldn't have sent me this baby if it wasn't supposed to happen this way.

I have another prenatal 2 weeks from this coming Tuesday as well as my scan. I really would have been happy to go without an ultrasound this time. It always feels sort of wrong to me to peek into the womb. If we were supposed to see in there our bellies would have come with zippers.

I've gained a whole 6 pounds and I have a hard time relating to those on my due date board who are so incredibly worried about how many pounds and when. I've always had the luxury of being relaxed about my weight gain since it's such a small number. It's nice to know that at least at THIS time in my life I can eat whatever I want and not gain. I started off this pregnancy at 180 pounds and if it's anything like my last 4, I will lose that within days and then drop another 15 from breastfeeding over the following 3 months. At that point I plan to hit the Boot Camp over in Sunnyvale and take off what I hope will be my last 30 pounds. It's most important to me that I lose fat and gain muscle though; I could really care less what the scale says as long as I can walk my skinny butt into Gap and put on a size 8 jeans. That's been my goal since before my pregnancy with Izzy!!!!